The Complicated Hierarchy of the Teenage World

The other day a comment was made by one of my friends.
About me.
It implied that I hold a lot of importance on social status.

To be totally honest, I was hurt and insulted by this comment.
I thought that this friend knew me well enough to know my thoughts on this issue.
But maybe not.

So I want to get something straight.
I don’t know whether my friend reads this or not but I still want to get my thoughts out about social status.

I hate social status.
Not because I don’t have much of it. And I know I don't have much of it.
No, I hate social status because there are too many young people out there who place too much importance on it.

I can see it not ruining they’re lives exactly, but certainly making them harder. I can see them throwing away their school life, not putting the best effort in, because that’s “not cool”. It’s “not cool” to be a nerd or to do well at school. To have high social status these days you need to throw away the will to put in any effort at school.

That’s why I don’t like social status. I see many people who place too much importance on social status and it ruins them as young people. They fail school. They go out and get drunk every weekend. They sleep with god knows how many boys.

I know many people like this. My sister for one. She isn’t at the getting drunk stage yet, but if she keeps going the way she’s going, she certainly will get there quick smart. Some people may say that I’m jealous of Libby. Jealous of her that she has the high social status, that she is the hot one, that she has all the boyfriends, that she is known by everyone. But I’m not jealous of her.

If I wanted I could get high social status in a heartbeat. I could be the “cool” one who goes to all the parties and gets drunk and has all the boyfriends. It’s easy to stop trying at school and buy all of the fashionable clothes and get all the boys onto you. This gets you high social status in the teenage world. But I can’t do that.

Because to get high social status, you have to stop being who you are and start being who you’re not.

And I thought you of all people would know that.

Why would I become someone who I’m not? Why would I stop being Stephanie and start being like half the girls in my grade? If I became like them then I would become a nobody. It’s funny how appealing the thought of being a nobody sounds good to so many people. Why is that I wonder? That’s a question I can’t answer.

If I wanted to be a “popular”, one of those girls who isn’t actually popular with anyone, except for maybe the boys, I would stop doing what they don’t like. I would stop doing band, I would stop trying at school, I would stop trying to be individual, I would stop doing choir, I would stop wanting to be a doctor, I would stop wearing the clothes I wear, I would stop doing my hair in the way I do it now. All of those things are easy to stop doing, if I wanted. But I don’t want to stop doing those things. How can I just give up my goal of being a doctor and of being successful later on? I can’t. I just can’t do it. And for me, I would give up the opportunity to be popular a thousand times, a million times even, if it means keeping who I am.

So I’m not jealous of those people who are popular. They are stuck in the here and now. But I am way into the future, where I am successful. And that’s what I tell myself whenever I sometimes get down about “not being popular”. Because I’ll admit, sometimes it does get me down. But only for a moment. Because then I think of the future and I know that if I went the way that they all do, then I would lose that future. And I can’t give up my future. Not for being popular. Not for anything.

Sometimes I just wish that perhaps they could see into the future as well.
Especially Libby.
Because she is my sister, so of course I care about her.
Because she is my sister, so I will always give her what she wants, which isn't always what she should have.